I was enjoying a sweet Sunday afternoon nap, (don't judge, it's self care 101). My sweet four year old came to "snuggle" with me. Her version of snuggling and mine are very different. Soon she was making silly noises and talking loudly. I placed my hand over her mouth and she made one of those obnoxious sounds that can only be made by blowing, vibrations on a hand or from your backside. Yep, in our house we call it "fart" noises :-) Which were followed by belly giggles and more of the same sounds, and repeat, for way longer than I would typically continue this silly behavior. You know like when a little dog wants to play fetch the little rubber ball, long after the fun is gone for the person throwing the ball. I laughed right out loud with her. I don't laugh often enough and this wasn't lost on her. She looked at me and said, "why are you laughing?" I said something like, "because you are silly and I like laughing with you." We laughed and giggled some more. I looked deep into her little pixie face and her bright blue eyes, which meant being very close to that face, because I wasn't wearing my glasses. This beautiful gift of a child. This sassy, crazy, wild, child. You see we didn't have to say yes. She came to us a different way.
She reminds me of a song I heard many years ago at a woman's retreat, a song I have never heard again. There was a line in the song talking about God's creation, "He could have made everything black and white and we would never known the difference." Just as that song was being sung the sun set on the lake in one of those glorious sunsets with colors from deep violet, to mango, and pink blush. The blue water of the lake only emphasized the beauty, every woman in the room was staring at the sunset, as that song ended.
This same feeling washes over me when I look up and see all seven of the children still at home stretched out on furniture and floor watching an episode of "Andy Griffith" or a family movie. I am filled with awe and gratefulness when our 16 year old sits next to me in the car and has to tuck his knees to fit into the seat, or he bends from his six foot plus height to hug me good night. I am abundantly blessed.
Because this blog is all about the journey, I should also include a little more about the week before the cuddles and giggles with my four year old. This blog isn't called Chasing Wounded Hearts for nothing, it's our journey!! All these things happened in one week, yep seven days, seven kiddos, and a mom and dad who love them and each other, so in no particular order:
- Child off meds for three days
- one child to ER for head injury - glued together
- one child lost computer privileges at school for generating a document that could be called cyber bullying (he was naive and did not make most of the comments on the document, but)
- homeschool ups and downs with one child
- I had to re-certify part of our health insurance
- Back door pulled off hinges
- dishwasher broke - won't drain
- my hormones are making me CRAZY!! menopause stinks
- Strong willed four year old - is there any other kind?
- telling three brothers their mom is trying to get custody of their 1/2 brother, the one they are in contact with and see at least every month
- telling son his birth dad was recently in the hospital
- baseball, t-ball and track practices
- missing shoes and permission slips
- my own health issues
- Countless hugs & snuggles
- laundry successes (see previous post)
- coffee & conversations with my hubby
- belly laughs and what we could have missed.